You know, saying goodbye to someone you love is always a really hard thing do to. And I'm not talking about the final goodbye, just a goodbye, time to move on, kind of goodbye.
You know they will always be there, just a phone call away but when you say that last goodbye its like the phone lines are cut, never to be mended. Maybe its the broken heart that makes it impossible to pick up the phone.
You have to go through the next few days with your heart in your throat and head racing and tears right on the edge.
I'm so freakin sick of being the girl thats "special" and the girl thats "important" I want to be the one girl they can never let go! Where is my damn prince charming. I want someone to love me unconditionally, without bounds, someone who would go to the ends of the earth to be with me, not someone who is unsure of what they want! How can people go through life being so unsure or what it is they want.
Maybe its the stubborn in my bones but when I set my mind on something and I say I'm going to do it. I do it. I dont half-ass it, i dont sway in my thoughts. Whats done is done and I do it. Then when I have to change my mind because its not possible anymore, it frustrates me. You set plans in your mind, you set plans for the way things will work out, and you work your butt off to make that happen because you SAID you would. Then the other half of your plan bails....What the hell are you supposed to do then, other than just get angry and frustrated.
I think when someone lets ya go to see if it would work out between an ex, thats probably the worse kind of slap in the face. "You aren't good enough to be with, so Im gonna see how it works out with this girl, that i've already known it didnt work out with." I think its the familiarity and convenience that makes someone turn to an ex. but who wants to just be with something thats familiar and convenient?! Don't you want excitement and spontaneity??? Dont you want something thats exciting, thats going to make your heart flutter and just feel good and happy on the inside?
Instead you would rather be with someone that a. you already ended it with, they are an ex for a reason and b. someone you are going to have to fight with and argue with all the time to make it work because you have already been with someone else. You have already TOLD that other person that you love them, yet, you can turn around and try to be with an ex. You think your ex isnt going to have some insecurities about that? I sure as hell would.
Screw you broken heart, Screw you.
